Just because... Namie Amuro and the Super Monkey's man the gates to Para para paradise

Once upon a time Namiserable Amuro was in a group. Shit went how it often goes for girl groups with that one member who does everything. People stopped caring about the hoes in the background and wanted more of the one who was actually singing on the songs and rocking the outfit that had a bit more sparkle and was showing a bit mo' leg.

With Japan being a little bit more civil and honorable (sometimes) their label didn't drop the background hoes when they decided to have Namie fly solo, but instead put them into a new unit called MAX before things got out of hand and a Super monkey went at Namie's face in the dressing room with a curling iron. The act of saving background hoes was admirable, but they were never going to last when the one thing which kept them paid was making her own money. Namie dropping "Body feels exit" was the final nail in coffins.

Whilst Namie continues to enjoy a solo career, outselling every other artist on Avex trax, the background hoes had to go back to work. Anna Makino works as a tatami mat cleaner, Reina Miyauchi runs a ryokan with her husband, Nanako Takushi works part time at a family mart and Ritsuko Matsuda is in hiding with Yu Suzuki after embezzling Shenmue 3 development money.

Now let's all witness Namie Amuro delivering the 90's para para pop crack that is "Try me" back during an era when Namie Amuro was giving real life. Watch for 1:08 when Namie drops da heater.

Namie wasn't born with hair 4 feet long and thigh high boots with a heel!? Who...da f**k...KNEW!!

Don't ask me why the Super monkey's had microphones. They don't even feature on the studio recordings of songs as backing vocalists.

Namie being a bit more current and hipper than most hoes means that she couldn't be any further removed from the 90's if she stepped through a Stargate. Meanwhile, Ayumi Hamasaki and Kumi Koda still be warbling how Namie was in this video.

Namie was WORKING in the early 90's. Now, she barely barely does anything. But I still love her and she stays getting paid more than your fave despite doing 137% less than they do. I do miss hearing Namie sing though. She seems to put in less and less effort singing with each album. Every album release from Style onwards, she's gained the ability to sing in key, but gives less vocally. But still...love dis hoe.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to play "Try me" for the 72nd time today and have my soul return to para para paradise.