Crystal Kay is a brand ambassador for some water

Crystal Kay is now a brand ambassador for Birštonas Mineral Water.

Now, there’s a lot of cool stuff which could be done with this. Crystal. Water. Okay. That’s all I’ve got. OH, WAIT. Crystal Kay singing a cover of Crystal Waters’ “Gypsy Woman” whilst she’s water bending. Look. Coming up with catchy marketing hooks is not my forte. But you get my point. Similar to Crystal’s partnership with Xyli crystal mints, there’s something that could be done here to play on Crystal’s name as it pertains to water. But instead we just got a 2 year old photo of Crystal Kay, with a bottle of water slapped on top of it. And the graphic designer couldn’t even put some opacity on the bottle.

Crystal Kay | Birštonas Mineral Water

C’mon now people. Why are we out here with a new brand partnership using a 2 year old photo? You mean to tell me nobody coulda stood Crystal Kay in front of a Shutterstock image of some water, had her hold a bottle and take a photo on a phone? Where is the TV commercial with a new Crystal Kay song?

This is the ghetto that Pharrell was singing about on Mary J. Blige’s “Steal Away”.

Girl. Fire the whole management and marketing team.

I’m really glad that Crystal Kay is getting some brand money. But at time of posting, Birštonas Mineral Water has 169 followers on Instagram and Vytautas has 46. An Instagram following is by no means a measure and equation to monetary value. But for an artist who is so active on Instagram and does literally all of their promo through Instagram, I just figured that Crystal’s team would have partnered her with a brand which has a slightly larger following. But that’s my fault for thinking that a team I’ve been telling Crystal to fire for years now would actually do something good that makes legit sense.

Every brand has gotta start somewhere, I guess. And in Crystal’s case — a bag is a bag.

But it is really unfortunate that Crystal doesn’t seem to be in a place where she is able to partner with Suntory, Kirin or ITO EN. Because I highly doubt that Birštonas Mineral Water has the budget to be doing full blown marketing campaigns and putting Crystal Kay in subway stations, trains, malls and on TV — which would have been the case had this been a link up with the aforementioned beverage companies. I just struggle to see the big benefit of this partnership for either party.

But…stepping stones. Hopefully this leads to something.

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