VMA 2013: A shady run down of events, in tweets

I had no plans to stay up until the wee hours for the VMA's last night...and yet I did. Before I knew it I was streaming the event live and tweeting like a mo'fucka on everything I was seeing.

Rather than write a piece on how much of a mess I found the VMA's to be (yet again) I've chosen to summarize my thoughts with the tweets I'd posted on the night, as they were my most instinctive thoughts.

Danity Kane's reunion...

'Where is D. Woods?' Home girl is parking dem cars for the celebs tonight and then working the graveyard at Wendy's | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

I'm happy for Danity Kane's reunion. But those girls will be fighting for a part time position at In-N-Out burger in a year's time | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

TLC on the red carpet...

T-Boz looks like a Decepticon | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Lady Gaga's performance...

It would be amazing if during Lady Gaga's performance of "Applause" nobody actually bothered to clap | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Lady Gaga going backstage to console One direction after getting booed...

Lady Gaga will leave her hotel door unlocked and hit those One Direction boys up on Whatsapp with her room number. Her thirst is REAL | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Justin Timberlake's performance...

Justin Timberlake just sent every dude in Pop and R&B to IKEA with a $20 coupon to pick a seat to take | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

On how Britney must feel watching Justin...

Britney is sat at home with a bubble tea and a king size Doritos packet as a blanket crying "I WISH HE WAS STILL MUH MAYAN!!" | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

On the 'NSync reunion...

That struggle Chris and Joey are experiencing to keep up is REAL | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Lance Bass' new Grindr profile pic will be of him on stage tonight. He'll be milking that for cock for a good few months | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

On where Usher stands following on from JT's performance...

Justin Timberlake is now the proud owner of a house n***a. His name is Usher Raymond | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Following JT's epic #VMA performance, this is the current situation of Justin and Usher » pic.twitter.com/CfhWVdOmqH
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

On Beyoncé...

Noreleasedateyoncé couldn't make the #VMA's this year because she is working on her new album. JUST KIDDING!!! She ain't working on shit.
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013

Noalbumyoncé will keep making all you bitches wait and stay buying those Pepsi multipacks until the album drops | #VMA
— Random J (@_RandomJ_) August 26, 2013